


Gordon Ramsey x Reader- A Culinary Affair

by thecontrastingroses



Category: Age Gap - Fandom, Gordon Ramsey, Hells Kitche
Genre: F/M, Fanfiction, Gordon Ramsey - Freeform, Gordon Ramsey fanfiction, Gordon Ramsey x Reader, Hells Kitchen - Freeform, Hot, Lemons, Love, NSFW, age gap, chef, lovefanfiction
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-15
Updated: 2021-01-25
Packaged: 2021-02-26 06:20:18
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 28
Words: 21,269
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21808813
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thecontrastingroses/pseuds/thecontrastingroses
Summary: You were never the type to seek out older men, in fact men in general. Your passions were strictly focused upon cooking and winning. And that's why being on Hell's Kitchen would be a great step in your culinary career. However, the ticking of the clock wasn't the only thing that made your heart race, and the goal to please Gordon wasn't just palpable when the cameras were turned on.As odd as it may look, Gordon and you were a very unlikely fitting pair. He was like the french fries to your chocolate shake. But lets not get ahead of ourselves you gotta read this shit.NOTICE: SMUT IN CHAPTER 7- Culinary Affair
Relationships: Gordon Ramsey/Reader
Comments: 27
Kudos: 157





	1. Gordon Sticks Up for You

There was nothing you were more grateful for than to be able to be on the show. To be given a chance was something you weren't used to, and so having your idol literally confirm permission to compete on Hells Kitchen was lucky! That doesn't go without saying that the other contestants weren't the nicest people. Since you were the youngest, and even a woman, you were chastised constantly by these middle-aged chefs. The only harsh criticism you were expecting was Gordon's. It wouldn't be a big deal but there's only so much you could take.  
It was time to go. Men verses women in serving the customers. The women were a little nicer than the men, there was a couple who would say rude things but anything more and others would call them out. The men were asshole though.  
Anyways the rush begins, when Gordon opens up the restaurant, he shouts for an appetizer of pan seared scallops. Instantly you're on it, the girls team works together well and gets the dish to Gordon before the boys.   
There's a long pause of tension as he evaluates the dish, you made.   
"Who made this dish?!" He bellows.  
Your stomach drops in doom. But you knew if you didn't answer it'd get worse.   
"I did- sir." You almost stammer. He looks past another chef in front of you and almost looks surprised.   
"This dish... is great for making it in such little time."   
Your stomach rises back in place along with a warmed heart of flattery.   
"Thank you chef!"   
"COME ON BOYS! HASNT EVEN BEEN 15 MINUTES AND THE GIRLS MAKE YOU ALL LOOK LIKE PUSSIES!!!" His shouts interrupted you but it sent you almost fleeing to make the Wagyu meatballs. Gordon's approval made you feel better than anything in the world. It was hard to focus on cooking. Your heart races at the sight of his satisfied eyes and smile.  
As your cutting vegetables rapidly, a waiter is storming towards holding the plate of Wagyu meatballs you had cooked.   
"Nice fucking job Y/n. Everyone at that table hates this shit!" Chad tosses the plate of food on the table and gets closer to your face. You wanted to stick up for yourself but you felt too weak. It was almost to horrible to be true. The meatballs? How are they bad? You know you cooked them long enough... to much spices? Maybe cooked too long... but they were the perfect color... Chad notices your bewildered face, a green light to keep going. He doesn't yell but merely hisses in your ear.  
"The customers aren't the only ones who think you should go back home Y/n, there is not point in staying when at the end of the day you end up a worse failure than before. Go back to fucking (wherever you live)"  
Suddenly- you see Chad being pulled away by a firm arm. Gordon has heard him you assumed, and everything he said despite his attempt to be somewhat silent.   
"The only dick that's going back to their home is you asshole. Out of my kitchen." He had Chad by the collar. Chad just frowns at the ground in shame while he pulls off his apron. Once he walked away Gordon turns to you with concern.  
"That was awful. Are you alright?" He places his hand on your shoulder, you almost twinge with the intensity of his touch. His soft side was wonderful to witness, and him sticking up for you was-  
"These meatballs, are good. I know anything you make does not deserve whatever those customers are shitting about." You're so overwhelmed by his kindness all you do is clench your hands together and thank him continuously, holding back tears.   
"Don't cry sweetheart, I'll go confront them about this, keep pleasing me alright?" He gives you a flirtatious wink along with a sly grin. It sends your heart flying.  
"..Yes- sir. Er- chef!" You stutter again as he walks away. As you get back to work your faced with the whole team looking back at you. Some with shock, relief, and ... jealously.

Oof.


	2. His Office

After surviving the nominations, and having to witness massive amounts of crying, the only thing that you were looking forward to was the jacuzzi back at the dorms. No one else really wanted to join you though, they all claimed to be too tired. So it was just you and the luminescent steam emitting from the warm water. You knew that reducing your stress in this competition was going to be how you win and the advantage you'd have over anybody else. The jacuzzi jets were relieving on the knots in your neck. And it was such a nice night, nothing could disrupt your prime time.

But at the end of that thought you hear the rushed swing of the dorm doors, and you see Britney, a team member, in slight panic. 

"Just got a call from Chef! He wants to see you immediately in his office!" 

"Now?! But I'm-"

As you start to get out she throws you a towel,

"I tried to tell him, but he doesn't seem to care I guess..."

Your stress levels rise but her shrug encourages you not to worry too much. So with a bikini, towel, and flip flops you are about to either die or... whatever else. Each step up the stairs was a boost on your stress level, you wondered if he'd get angry at the trail of puddles your leaving behind. Once you reach the top, you see a blur of his silhouette through the glass doors. He seems to see you as well, because it was a sudden glance and then looking away nervously. With a deep breath, you open and walk into his office. 

"You needed me Chef?" You tried to sustain your shivers triggered by the air conditioning he had on. You noticed Gordon slipping a look at your body, you wrap yourself more with the towel. You didn't want him noticing your goosebumps.

"Ah-em. Yes." He sits down on his chair, secretly amused by your appearance. 

"I just wanted to let you know that you can not, I repeat; can not, let the others talk to you like how Chad was talking to you. I can tell that wasn't the only time. They cannot be the cause of your downfall- which by the way, you've been doing a very good job for a girl being harassed the whole time."

He smiled and enunciated the word "girl", it made you blush a little, he liked that you were young. 

"Right I know chef. Thank you- I'm sorry I didn't know who I could tell, I didn't think it was serious enough."

"You can tell me." He stands up again and walks around his desk towards you slowly. Your face flushes a little more, how peculiar that you were attracted to Gordon Ramsey.

"The only one here who has the right to make you feel insecure and yell is me." His eyes glide over your bare shoulders down your cleavage but back up to your eyes to see if you noticed.   
You did. He was a couple feet in front of you now, intimidating you.

"I know." You look to the side to avoid his overwhelming stare.

"You know... what?"

You swallow wondering what he was getting at, there was a clear sexual tension.

"I know... chef."

>>TO BE CONTINUED


	3. Potential Distraction

There was a pause. Long one. An anticipation for his next action grew, almost leaving you holding your breath. But he just gave a friendly grin that totally contradicted the provocative atmosphere. 

"Alright well, that's all I wanted to say; get some sleep for tomorrow."

He turns away cueing your excusal. With a held breath you make your way back to the hotel, the cold didn't even give you goosebumps because of the warm feeling buzzing in your chest. You did not say a word to anybody when you got to your room. You lock the door and collapse onto the bed giggling and squealing like a idiotic high school girl. You couldn't seem to help yourself though; all you wanted was his approval. You have exactly that right now! Even more than you expected, even more than you should... When you think of his eyes you can't help but melt a little bit. And what he said he was the only one that could yell at you and have power over you made it hard to not be fully aroused.

"No!" You bark at yourself pulling the covers over your head while turning over in frustration. He was not going to distract you. It's a good thing you caught yourself before you get too over your head about a good looking older man.

Sleep was the best option to get your head straight.

...

AN: (Sorry for short chapter posting again soon)


	4. Victory From Lamb

You wake up from a dream that immediately leaves your memory as your eyes fixate on the ceiling. You don't recognize the room at first. A small part of you thought you'd wake up back home, still cooking for rude tourists in "first-class" hotels with horrible management.   
But then the excitement catches back up to you; you're one day closer to becoming the champion of Hell's Kitchen. Today you're going to kill it and not make any mistakes.  
Hopefully.. For the most part.  
You rush to the kitchen with the rest of the chefs. Gordon is already standing there with a cheeky smile, ready to give the challenge.

"Good morning everyone, hopefully you all got a good night's sleep because..."

He leans forward a bit with his arms behind his back.

"You're going to have to use your brain for this one. More than usual!"

Suddenly a guy dressed as the Riddler from Batman jumped out from behind the line of chefs! The dude scared everyone shitless especially your partner Jessie. It made it hard for Gordon to hold back from laughing. 

"So our good friend Riddler here has got some pretty tricky riddles for each pair of partners,"

The guy takes off his green hat and shows little folded papers inside with a clown-like grin. You wonder how they didn't fall out onto his head when he lifted the hat off his head.

"You have 45 minutes to figure out the center of the dish; and make your recipe! Ready... GO!"

Everyone races and pushes to Riddler's hat, you were able to slither past, reach in the hat and grab one quickly. You dash to the counter and read the riddle to Jessie:

It's doomed to the start  
But protected along with the family  
"Unblemished and without spot" the Bible said  
Not if the slaughter house has anything to say about it

Automatically you got it! You whisper to Jessie just in case anybody else got the same riddle,  
"Jessie Jessie! It's a dish with lamb!"

"Ohhhh!"

"SHHHh!" You shush her but everyone was already looking at you both, maybe to hear a hint of their own riddle.

"Ok... here's what I'm thinking, one pan glazed rack of lamb with spiced red onions and potatoes."

"Shouldn't we go for sweet and sour instead of spicy?" Jessie questions.

"No. Whoever else has the lamb will think that as well. Let's go. You make the potatoes and red onions. I'll cook the meat."

As you're cooking, Gordon yells you have only 5 minutes left. You look over and your partner is lacking in speed which at the moment infuriates you.

"Jessie! Hurry up with those potatoes! I'm almost done with the lamb!" You bark at her.

"Fuck! OKAY!"

You look over again and see she didn't cut the red onions small enough, you go over grab the knife and chop like the world's ending. 

"What are you doing?!" She yells at you.

"You don't know how to do your job! The slices are too big! I want this to be a 5 star okay?!"

You realize you were loud enough for even Gordon to hear you, you could feel him staring at you from in front of you. For a moment you just keep your head down but you had to know how bad he was mad at you. So you look up. And he doesn't seem mad or irritated at your aggression. But... Proud.  
He seems impressed by ability to take control and be firm, you blush and smile at him, but inside it's that fangirling feeling from last night.  
Finally you both come together and put it all together to make it presentable. You thought for sure if this isn't a 5 than a 4 at least, it looks great. You were the first to put your dish up.

"Ah lovely, what have you both made for us Y/n?" He makes you blush again with the eye contact.

"This is one pan glazed rack of lamb with spiced red onions and potatoes." You fidget with your apron in nervousness. As he takes a bite you break a sweat a bit.

"This is a great start, beautifully cooked, red onions aren't too spicy... and lamb is the correct answer if you're wondering... I'll give it a 4."

Your team and Jessie cheers but you can't help but wish you got a 5. There was nothing wrong with it right? Maybe it wasn't creative enough. You are a good enough chef. Maybe he didn't want to give you too much pride.  
After all the dishes it was a tie between the two teams. Gordon always chooses the best dish overall and that's the team that wins. You doubt he would consider your's considering it wasn't a 5. But next thing you know,

"Y/n and Jessie's dish!"

The team screams with cheers for you both, you were about to have the best day because of your victory!

"I think you girls are going to love what's in store for you, how does a helicopter ride to the beautiful french restaurant C'est Magnifique sound to you girls?" 

A/N: Sorry for taking forever to get another chapter in, next chapter will be more juicy I swear ;)


	5. Flavors to Offer

You and your team are escorted to the balcony of C'est Magnifique where you find Gordon standing at a wonderfully arranged dinner table. Behind it was the vast ocean view, the railing on the ledge had floral vines growing through the gaps and crevices. Everything was accented by the lighting from the overhead lanterns. 

Even with all this the only thing that was really taking your breath away was how sexy Gordon looked. Wearing a rich burgundy dress shirt with black slacks and the iconic sunshades. His rolled up sleeves was really hugging his biceps and chest. Especially with him crossing his arms, his forearm crevices deepened. And upon your arrival, he couldn't contain a beaming smile. It had more happiness than usual. You tried to recall when you would watch Hell's Kitchen if he had ever had a face like that.

"Maybe he really was pleased with our performance... or mine?.." You thought to yourself. "Nah."  
You see Gordon take off his shades,

"Ladies!" He reaches his arm at the view as if to display it. "Better than cleaning the kitchen right?"

"Yes Chef!"

When being seated Gordon calls out your name to sit next to him. He kept insisting you could smell the lavender growing on the railing vines. You wondered if he was using that as an excuse but why would he want to sit next to you of all people? With butterflies in your stomach you sit yourself on the cushioned chair. More than anything all you could smell was his cologne. Made you melt. "Nothing better than this..." It was a warm evening as well. At times like this it's tempting to pinch yourself just to make sure you're not dreaming. But you were too busy observing his mouth as he talked about his experiences in the French kitchen.

"Oh my word..." Carla subtlety interrupted with a face of shock and concern. She noticed a deep carving from his right inner elbow to his bicep. He reassured her,

"This," he pointed rolling up his sleeve more, "-was one of the worst burns I had ever-"

"What happened?!" Many of the girls were anxious for a story.

"Just a slip, landing onto the hot stove. Third degree burns."

Without thinking you reach over to hold and examine the scar. Nobody seemed to care as they kept chattering on, only he was affected with a rush of excitement. You see the intense scar tissue, thinking of the pain made your heart ache for him.

"Damn." You exhale, and look up to see a smirk.

"Damn indeed." He seemed more than happy to have your examination. Gordon made your face flush again just like the other night in his office. You let go of his arm and quickly gulp down your ice water to cool down. He laughs.

"Ha ha! I was just being clumsy," he grabs everyone's attention again,

"But you should've seen me when I was a boy! Woo-"

"You were clumsy?" Barbra asks with doubt.

"Fat. That's what makes you make mistakes with your... spacial awareness. But I mean..."

Girls try to hold in their giggles at the thought of Gordon as a fat boy.

"A little exercise and you'll be just fine- getting some pounds off- but not all!"

He looks at you intently, you feel a hand slip upon your bare thigh.

"Some fat is very good. Gives flavor."

A squeeze ignites your skin. You feel a stimulating leap in your stomach feeling his grip. Apparently the innuendo sent a laughing track among the table. It was all muted and blurred in your mind. All your senses focused on his hand with a shocking desire for it to go...

But it leaves and goes to your knee as he chuckles along with them. You eyes trail to his, and with a cheeky wink you were shot in the heart. But that all ended quickly.

"Ah! Dinner!" Gordon's hand leaves completely and the rest of the night, even when you go back to the rooms, you wonder how this isn't going to be a distraction.   
Gordon... leading you into thinking of things you shouldn't. Like... that hand enjoying more of your flavors.

For fucks sake you should be strategizing for tomorrow's challenges.


	6. The Empty Kitchen and Dining Hall

As days passed, you felt your relationship with Gordon escalate. With the way he looked at you and the suggestive remarks he would say to you... At one of the morning challenges he tasted your dish and made a exaggerated pleasurable hum. Saying, "So good mmm, great job Y/n." while licking sauce off his fingers sensually.

It was great- but not. You were stressed on how far this was going to go. There was way more cons than pros when it came to having Gordon as a .... whatever you want to call it.

A dream slips away and you notice it's morning. It occurred to you that there was no chef banging pots screaming "WAKE THE FUCK UP!". Puzzled, you turn over to the bed next to you. No body within the covers, you look to another, nobody either! An audible gasp escapes your lips,

"Oh God no-!"

You launch yourself out of bed forcefully putting on the chef suit and with no hesitation run out the door. You're running down the hall to the kitchen expecting the worse humiliation and disappointed eyes. You see the open doorway, you tighten your fists and face your demise head-on. An empty kitchen and dining hall awaits you.

You look around with confusion, you don't see anyone or anything.

"Hello?" You speak up to the quiet. "Maybe they're on a retreat?" You think to yourself in worry, but your watch only says 6:23. Looking up from your watch there is something at the corner of your eye, at the entrance of the dining room.

"Finally alone am I right?"

You turn to see Gordon, his arms crossed, half-sitting on a table. "Its like he teleported!" You think to yourself not that entirely surprised to see him. You give him a confused smile,

"Where is everyone chef?"

"Where are your shoes dear?"

Your eyes grow wide, you look down in embarrassment to see you are barefoot.

"I apologize chef, I rushed to the kitchen when I realized I was alone." His gaze intensifies as he walks closer. You keep yourself composed not sure what to expect.

"Let me be clear with you Y/n,"

You predict a scolding.

"You're even more sexy when you look a little messy."

The pulse knocking on your chest quickens, you lose track of your breathing you can't even look at him with a hand over your mouth.

"What do you mean? I mean I- thank you... Sorry I'm not sure how to respond to that."

He closes in on you and holds your face to line up with his. Your hand is still awkwardly on your mouth and you can't put it down for some reason.

"Say you want me to..." He takes your hand off your lips. You can feel the breath of his words, "finally fuck you."

Looking into his eyes you feel him getting hard through his pants, with courage you slip your hand rubbing the tip. His flinch and surprised approval turns you on so much.

"I want you to finally fuck me chef."


	7. A Culinary Affair

Your lips go to war with his, he pushes you into the kitchen where he sets you on top of the table. Your fingers course through his hair, the excitement accelerating as he unbuttons your chef coat one button at a time. When revealed, he kisses and bites on your stomach and up your chest. You did not have the patience for teasing, you needed your bra ripped off right now. You were just about to move your hands to take it off but he beat you to it. You feel his gruff fingers unclip the simple nude colored bra. He reacts to it with a cute smile.

"I would've worn something sexier..." You breathed into his ear.

"What did I say before darling?" His hand cuffs the side of your neck, his thumb pressing right behind your jaw bone. While the other starts to explore your breast.

"Right...But you should really see me when I'm trying chef." You reach down and pull down his pants to see his erection fighting against his boxer briefs. Your eyes look back from his cock back into his. He plays with your tits not only with his hands but his mouth. Your head falls back. You felt yourself getting so wet from his pleasurable hums in your tits. You didn't love your tits but he seemed more than happy with them even if you thought they didn't live up to expectation.  
You desperately wrap your legs around his torso trying to feel his bulge against your crotch. He stops to notice your desperate wiggling.

"You want it don't you?" You blush from the teasing.

"Don't you?" He holds your chin up to his. You don't say anything, you want him to tease you more.

"You want my huge chef cock inside of you?" His deep voice sends you over the edge making you release a gasp of a moan.

"Yes, please-!"

He quickly takes out his cock, he was thinking of eating you out first but at this point his dick's twitching to your weak little face. There was no way he could hold back anymore and so could you, it had been too long of sexual tension ever since you met him. Your sexual experience has never been anything more than eh. Some dumb drunk hookups that would've been rape if the other wasn't drunk himself. Ever since then you've never had too much of an interest in sex anymore, it's all been just studying and working. Never would you have guessed that you'd be so wet for Gordon as he's about to fuck you on the kitchen table where you've cooked the appetizers.   
He slaps the tip on your clit making you flinch in pleasure. He was so big... bigger than the other guys you've had.

"Please fuck me chef, with your massive cock- I can't take it anymore!"

"It would be my pleasure,"

Slowly his cock seeps into your pussy so you can feel every sensation. It glides in and out easily as you both intensely collide tongues. He gradually gets faster and faster,

"Isn't this against the rules?" You gasp along with a giggle.

"What? Having you laying down on the table as I slam my cock into you? Do you want me to stop?" He slows down for a second until you sit up and beg to him,

"Please don't..."

"Naughty girl."

He holds you down by the hair and fucks you harder than before, you feel like a doll, almost paralyzed from the stimulation. You knew for sure this was going to become an addiction. Sounds you have never made before echo out the kitchen and into the dining hall. You were so fucked out of your mind you didn't even care if anyone heard.   
Suddenly his hand goes over your clit, making you go full speed into an orgasm.

"Chef- Ah! Wait! I'm gonna cum!"

"Me too Y/n!" He groaned back. His body and face starts to tense up. You assume he started to rub your clit to have an on-time orgasm. Smart guy.

"MMMm I want you to bust me open with your cum Gordon! Ah!"

"Shit- I want you to cum with me!"

"Gordon! I-"

"Yeah-!"

"GORDON! I'm-!"

"OH FUCK!"

He slams into you a few more times. Your vision almost goes completely white before you both exclaim in your passionate orgasm. He releases a beastly groan while you almost cry out in ecstasy. When finished he collapses on top of you in relief, both of you gasping for air.

"Wow." Gordon chuckles.

"Yeah. Wow." You smile back.


	8. Explanation/Another Win

"Um... where in the hell were you?" Your team mates had just gotten back to wherever Gordon sent them. You were back in the room, doing your laundry to pass the time. It was at this moment you started fishing through your mind a lie to come up with. Jessie and the others were giving you questioning frowns, some more aggressive than others. But you could tell with Jessie right in front of you that she was genuinely apprehensive.

"He wanted me to stay and clean the kitchen while you guys were gone."

"Clean the kitchen?!" Carla blurted, her voice scoffed with doubt. 

It was true! In a way... Both you and him cleaned the kitchen after having your fun. He was determined to not leave a trace of anything behind. 

"It's true!" You rehearsed your thought.

"So you got to skip a challenge just because... he punished you for no reason by having you clean the kitchen?" Jessie with her arms crossed, tilts her head to one side. You needed to think of a better explanation quick! 

"Yeah he specifically punished me for waking up late but he didn't want to send me home." You hands fiddled with your last pair of socks getting a little aroused by the thought of Gordon "punishing" you. 

"Well shit okay." Jessie rolling her eyes, shrugged with exaggeration. She turned away along with Carla and the others. Now it was your turn for the questions.

"Wait- you guys won your morning challenge right?"

"Unfortunately..." Jessie gave a nervous smile. Your heart sank.

"Are you kidding me?" You slapped your hands on your forehead, but then it occurred to you everyone was changing into casual clothes. 

"Of course we fucking won, you're not the only great cook here Y/n."

"Fuck yeah! Where are we going?!" You jumped up holding onto her shoulders.

"Descanso Gardens!"

You stop jumping, not in disappointment just puzzlement. 

"What's wrong?" Jessie starts to put on a ripped up skinny jeans that made you cringe.

"It just seems kinda too... romantic." You whisper, "-I was just expecting some place with a lot of action instead of just looking around."

She's intrigued by your comment but she simply says,

"I suppose he enjoys slowing down and getting to know us Y/n."


	9. Arriving at the Garden

Even though Gordon made eyes at you to sit next to him on the ferry, you decided to sit behind him with Jessie instead. You're paranoid that if anybody were to sense the affection you both have, that would be a gossip wild fire. He wasn't being entirely careful though, obviously admiring how you look today. You chose a salmon colored, floral tea dress that accentuated your figure. With that a dark gray jacket that you kept on since you felt a little too feminine.

Annnnd of course. Carla with her tube-top and the suffocating skinny jeans, leaps at the spot next to Gordon. She almost falls on top of him because of her extravagant party high heels. Probably on purpose. It makes you want to rip her huge hoops earrings out.

"Ohe mai gosh hai guyz!" She turns around her face contorted into a grin. The excessive chewing of her gum enrages you and Jessie. Jessie mouths to you secretly, "How old is she again?" making you almost laugh out loud.

"This is guhnna be saohhh much fun! Are we naht like, the behst chehfs eva?!" Her hand, along with her neon claw-like acrylic nails, ran up and down Gordon's bicep. Before you could actually rip her hoops out, Gordon spoke up.

"Don't get used to success, it ruins your consistency." He sets her hand off his shoulder calmly.

Carla looks puzzled for a moment but locks her eyes back to her phone. Gordon sees your expression at her, and smiles keenly at your jealousy. Flustered and afraid anybody saw him, you scroll aimlessly through your instagram feed.   
Ignoring him.

The ferry comes to a steady stop, with the driver repeatably saying "Stay seated until we come to a COMPLETE stop please." 

"Have any of you ladies been to Descanso Gardens?" Gordon stands up anyway despite the driver's instruction. She glared at him through the top mirror. His question causes an uproar of various yes'es and no's from the girls startling her.

"We will be having a picnic at 12:30, at the huge weeping willow. You'll find it. For the next-" He looks at his watch, "-hour we will explore the gardens." He enthuses making all the women cheer. You catch eyes with him and at that moment you knew you just wanted to be with him.

The line of women rushing to get out of the ferry wasn't any more polite than- not even high school but middle school. All you could think of was being with Gordon but keeping everything secret and lowkey was the gameplan...

The warm L.A. sun hits your body stepping out of the ferry. He was waiting, with the other women scattering, even Jessie goes off to hang out with another group, everything is going nicely! Until Carla... starts to talk to him.

"Isn't dis sowe beautifall?! I've never seen anythin loik eet!!!" She jumps around eager to have Gordon take her to explore. Before she could take him by the arm he says nicely to her,

"Oh I know, I do have to stay here to talk to the driver. Also I believe your friends are waiting darling." He points over her to a group of other thots waving at her from across a redwood bridge. She looks back and with the same tormenting enthusiasm she waves back and exclaims she's coming. After another wave to Gordon she fast walks to her friends. This whole time you stood with a headache from Carla.

He seems unfazed however and all he does is just look back at you. He tries to keep from smiling but when he fails there's the biggest cutest grin. You couldn't hide back either, just that morning you had sex with Gordon Ramsey who is around twice your age and is a married man. There's a part of you that frowns at your unethical feelings and decisions although it could not be helped that you are helplessly in love with your chef.

You take his hand and enter the garden.


	10. The Maze

You both say nothing as you take in the lush surroundings. It was wonderful, but the intimidating bugs flying back and forth made you paranoid.

No words are discussing you and Gordon's situation. It was also wonderful but the thought of tackling the issues of your's and his unknown intentions and feelings; made you paranoid... also. 

You just want to avoid them. You try to distract yourself with the beauty of the garden. There's flowers blossoming in every color, overhanging trees, the cherry blossoms falling with grace. Your eyes widen in awe."As long as I don't mess with the bugs they won't mess with me." You think to yourself.

Your hand starts to sweat more though. And your face starts to become tense. "How would this even work anyway? I'm probably going to return home whether I win or not." It's all starting to mess with you. In your peripheral view you see Gordon's face turn to yours, his smile easing your stress. 

"How are you doing love?" His thumb strokes back and forth on yours.

It's hard for you to answer, so for the moment you just nod and keep walking. Deeper into the garden. Through every step there are more things you're attempting to ignore. The threats, concerns, plans... Your pace is a bit slower than his, maybe it's because he's been here before. He does seem familiar with this whole thing.

"Have you been here before?" You ask with another thought in your mind.

"Yeah this is a trip that a lot of winning teams have been on."

"Oh, yeah- duh." 

He does see in your expression that there is something you both need to discuss. 

"These damn bugs..." You dodge a wasp.

"Come here I got you." He holds you closer, his arm on your waist. Your paranoia ceases for a moment. But then rises when thinking, "That seems like something he does a lot."

You both reach the hedge maze, it was away from the bugs. Without really thinking you both start to get caught in the twists and turns. You start to cheer up as he playfully chases you. You hope he'll grab you when he catches you. But you don't make it easy for him. Giggling, you run even faster, expecting to have him way behind. The moment you turn though he has already caught you and is carrying you over his shoulder. After spinning you around he sets you down, your back leaned against the surprisingly steady hedge. Laughter and exasperated breathing are the only thing you both hear. Until you catch your breath,

"What do you think about this morning?" You have a serious tone.

He stops, for a moment but is pleased by your question.

"It's what I've been wanting ever since I laid eyes on you."

He halts the rest of what you about to say by kissing you. Before you become completely enticed you pull away and start to walk forward.

"You had feelings for me since the beginning?" You say in doubt.

"Well, it was a admiration for how you look... Then seeing you more, made me want you more." He follows behind with the intent to hold you again.

"What do you want me to be?!" You turn to him harshly unleashing your stresses.

"What?" He's taken aback.

"Another contestant you can easily fuck and receive ego-boosting affection?" You both start to walk deeper in the maze.

"Why do you think-?"

"Just be honest, this is something you've done before right?"

"What? No- I have never..."

"-Cheated on your wife." You finish his sentence with aggression. But with instant regret and guilt. That's all there is in the atmosphere in the long pause.

"Yes. Had an affair." 

At this point you both realize in horror how deep you are in the perplexing maze now.


	11. Getting Out of the Hedges

"Dammit it's almost 12:30.." Gordon references looking at his watch. Even with some guilt and paranoia of possibly being lost in the hedge maze, you keep discussing the conflicts of the relationship. He seems very anxious to get out of there. You follow him as his pace quickens.

"Do you happen to cheat on your wife a lot? How many times have you gotten other chefs alone in the kitchen?" It's difficult to maintain your aggression when your almost jogging. His long legs move faster.

"As easy as it was to have sex with me, I'm not a slut. It just so happens I -"

"You need to shut the fuck up and help remember how to get out of here." He states boldly. He shrivels a little bit at the sound of himself swearing at you.

"Fuck you I can get out of here on my own!" 

You go up to the hedge walls and start to try to climb up. You stick your hands and feet deep in the bushes. The sharp sticks and branches form scratches on your legs and hands. Especially with the tea dress you wearing, it's easy to potentially get scars.

"What are you doing?! It's not safe!" Gordon stops and looks up to you with stress. You say nothing as you struggle to reach the top. All you need to see was the sign that's at the entrance of the maze. With every scratching and borderline painful move, you get closer. You get higher. The branches get more unstable. It's okay though! You see the sign!

"We're not that far away Gordon. See this was a good idea to come up here."

But then you look down.  
You're way farther up then you thought. Gordon probably didn't hear what you just said because you just see him worried out of his mind.  
It was inevitable; you wobble and lose your balance. You cry out as you fall down, certain you were going to hurt both you and Gordon. But with shocking comfortability; he catches you in his thick arms. But the force of gravity went against him and he ended up falling to his knees. Your arms grip around his neck. You expect him to be angry, that's why you keep from looking at him.

"I knew you'd fall." Gordon sounded like a dad.

"Sorry. I do know how to get out now." Your voice is small.

"Not worth you getting hurt."

You unlock your arms from his neck and look at him. His irritation wasn't as bad as you thought.

"I uh-" He started.

You wait for him.

"I'm sorry for swearing at you."

This shocks you out of your mind. His whole being is swearing at people being dumb. His eyes look sad, and it makes your heart melt. You want to kiss him on the cheek but you just say,

"It's okay."

He lets you down gracefully, gets up, and holds your hand with lovely intent. You both start walking; you leading the way. Gordon is slow and careful with his words when he speaks again.

"Let me tell you, I have been attracted- to other contestants in my whole time having Hell's Kitchen. It's been nothing more than a bit of flirting."

"I have done things that has been both thought out and not thought out... Um, but that thought out stuff was after I realized ... that.. you're worth it."

You keep on the search for the exit. You feel better but still confused.

"I fucked you without thinking about if you just see me as a 'good time'."

"-I have more respect than that! If there would be anything you didn't want it would be a automatic -"

"What do you want me to be?" It's a genuine question. With no aggression.

"You need to stop interrupting me." Gordon has a playful smile.

"I don't want you to be a 'one time', 'good time' or an 'impulsive decision'. I really want you to .. just be mine."

His voice cracks. Your heart explodes.

"I know there are more problems with us being together. I would battle them for you..."

There's a silence, only footsteps progressing through the dirt path.

"Would you battle them with me?"

You both turn the corner to see the exit. You aren't scared anymore.

"Yes chef."


	12. Jordan?

It was 12:45 by the time you and Gordon reached the weeping willow for lunch. It was instinct to split once you and him were in the line of sight of the others. There would've been more suspicion but Carla and her two other friends were late. From what you could tell everyone believed you and him had no correlation. You scurry to Jordan sitting next to her friends on a picnic blanket. You plop down next to her saying a quick hi.

"Hey! Where were you?" She asked wishing you came with her.

"Oh man I- really needed some time alone sorry." You feel bad for lying and not knowing she would want to hang out. But surely she was satisfied enough with her friend group.

"Aw no worries..." She holding something back, but before you could ask Gordon is yelling at Carla and her friends who are trying to walk up the hill in heels.

"I said to be back here at 12:30!" He's half mad, you grin at his hypocrisy. "Your fault." He mouths to you with an alluring smile.

Everyone is seated in the grass and waiting for Gordon to announce ... something... 

"Aren't we having a picnic or-?" Jordan lowers her voice to you. Before you could say anything Gordon runs down the hill, coming back with a big cardboard box in his hands. 

"Lunch arrived late!" The cardboard box is filled to the brim with gourmet sandwiches. He sets in front of everybody. Its like a light bulb to a flock of moths, everyone dives to the open box. You and Jordan wait patiently though. 

Gordon strides to you and sits crossed legged next to you, it makes you nervous again. You look quickly at Jordan to see if she's seeing his suspicious behavior. That's when you saw that she had a strange look in her eyes. She was looking at Gordon.. To your dismay she seemed overly excited. That gleam in her eyes were apparent, it was all too familiar for you. All of this you only noticed in a flash second. She snapped out of it when she became aware that you looked at her. Playing it off like she just wanted to tell him something.

"Oh Gordon! Uh- you should tell us..."

You couldn't hear the rest of her words, you had a aching feeling. You weren't worried of losing Gordon, it was just so unfortunate that there's either going to be a conflict between you and her or shes going to feel heartbroken or dissapointed. For the rest of lunch you weren't yourself. You didn't talk much as the chatter grew among Gordon, Jordan and the rest of the team. Your silence did concern him for a moment. Between conversation he put his hand on your shoulder, giving a subtle caring look that asked how were you doing. You smile and nod back. And you were fine for the most part. Until you catch Jordan staring- just then moving her pupils elsewhere. 

"Is this something to bring up?" You think to yourself. "I know! I'll bring it up as like a joke. She doesn't know how I feel." 

All interactions that you both had were on the surface. You and Gordon got to the trolley before anybody else. You request to Gordon to let you sit with Jordan alone. Without him listening. You tell him as your stepping onto the vehicle. He looks puzzled but he assumes it's just girl-talk.

"Alright baby but you're gonna owe me." His whisper was rushed and raspy. Gave you a stimulating quiver. You didn't respond and just trot to the middle of the bus. Planning on calling out to Jordan once she catches up. But once the rest of the team start to get on, it was starting to get loud and roudy in the trolley, so you pull out your phone to text her quickly.

'Jordan sit next to me Im in the middle'

When she doesn't respond right away you add:

'I reaaaallly wanna ask you somethin'

You see her start to walk up the steps, and see her head look down to her phone.

'But no one is sitting next to Gordon!'

In horror you look up to see her plop herself down next to him. And the trolley starts moving. He's confused and looks back at you. Even with your petrified frustration you gave "the okay" look and just decided to text her.

'Haha what you like him or sumn? ;)'

'You're the one whos always with him lol.'

You wanted to type "wym?" but you knew she probably knew things that you didn't. 

'I guess haha' You're proud at your coolness. You see her type but no reply so you text again:

'What are you guys even talking about?'

'I will tell you later.' She replies immediately. Her words felt ominous to read. It filled with you with striking anxiety.

'wdym?? Why am I worried haha'

She leaves you on read for minutes and minutes.

'Jordan?'

You knew there was something up. And you knew there is something that you need to get the stomach to swallow. So with one more look back up to their heads that seemed to close together for your liking, you try to prepare yourself for anything.

A/N: Wowie that took wayyyyy too long haha all well I think this chapter is semi long enough and we got sumn going on :O


	13. Bathroom Girl Talk

Throughout the whole trolley ride back, you wait for some kind of reassuring action from Jordan. Like a head turn back to you or something. But as the distance from Hell's Kitchen shortened, from the looks of it you were convinced that they were having a very engaging conversation. Jealousy starts to seep in and staring turns to leering. Her left leg leaves the sight of the aisle, her whole body turns towards him, her head lowers a bit. You imagine her mouth near his ear which is the trigger for the next text.

"Stop fucking flirting for two seconds and tell me what you guys are talking about"

Your thumb is hovering over the send button. You're not sure if this is a good idea now that you've typed it out. While thinking, you finally notice that the trolley had stopped and the girls were piling out. Your eyes shot up to see just when Jordan stepping out. The girl behind you gets annoyed when you cut in front of her. You didn't know who to talk to first, Gordon or Jordan. From the looks of it, you weren't going to be able to catch a convo with her until the end of the day after dinner service. He was already pretty far ahead to the restaurant once you rushed out the trolley. But you run after him, the anxiety of not knowing growing exponentially. 

"Hey!" You run in front of him to look at his face. It did not look good. You could tell he was holding a similar anxiety because his face, was not facing yours. 

"Is everything okay? I know that you and Jordan must've been talking... uhm- did she upset you or...?" This was very awkward, and it wasn't until now that you notice other girls were hearing this. Your brain scavenges for something to say to avert their curiosity. 

"Er- chef! Everything that Jordan said was... my fault and-"

In your peripheral view you see the others move along but Gordon interrupts you suddenly,

"You need to head to your room."

It was a stone-cold straight order. You did your best in all your confusion to not show any shock or hurt.

"Yes chef."

They heard that one. And had the impression that you're in trouble. You started to wonder that yourself. Your eyes become tender from the hold back tears. But you head to your room and before confronting Jordan, shed a few tears in the bathroom just to let some out. You wash your face and makeup, you wanted to reapply for tonight. Some part of you wondered maybe he will treat you differently if you look better. There's a knock on the door,

"It's open!" You say out of a towel.

You hear the door open but not much else, you peek up from your towel to see Jordan standing in the doorway. You weren't sure why, but it really pissed you off.

"So you wanna tell me what you guys were talking about now?" You try to keep a joking tone but there was still a bit of hostility. She says nothing and closes the door,

"Ooh is this a secret?" You continue.

"For your sake; yeah." 

You would hate to admit it to anyone but that did scare you. And certainly baffling since you and her were supposed to be partners in this Hell's Kitchen. Maybe she just said that because you were being rude. You decide to apologize to get the tension out of the atmosphere.

"Listen, sorry for being assy... But you really got me on edge. I mean if you really don't want to tell me its okay Jordan. You've been a great friend throughout all of this. Most people here I'm pretty sure don't like me. Maybe its just because I'm younger and they think I'm a threat or something I don't know. But you seem to get along with everyone and I think you being friends with everyone breaks division."

Jordan doesn't say anything, she's smiling, but mostly thinking. This "dramatic" pause was starting to get on your nerves.

"So... yeah." You nudge the silence away.

"It's good to be friends with everyone." She finally says something.

"Oh, well... yeah."

Another fucking "dramatic" pause. And she sighs out.

"Hahhhh-! How do I say this?!" She has a unsettling smile. But you chuckle to her weirdness.

"Hhh-I don't know haha..."

She's very eccentric all of a sudden, but she abstains from another pause. 

"Ok ok ok. So its always good to make everyone feel like you're a friend to them. People tend to easily open up to me. And when they don't, I know they're hiding something big. So..."

You start to believe that you could not prepare for what she was about to say.

"When you kept talking about Gordon to a minimum and never acknowledging your relationship with him to me and always playing dumb and all this bull shit, I knew something was UP!" She points her finger at you. 

"Jordan if you like him or whatever... and just feel like I'm stealing... I've only 'stole' him from one person: his wife." You feel like a serious homewrecker. "Which was not intentional!"

She starts laughing. If you would call that laughing, it was more like convulsing cackling. 

"I already know you're fucking him!"

This dramatic pause was not scripted.

"... What the fuck are you talking about?"

"Everyone has to pay for their sins! Ok ok so listen: In the trolley I just simply enlightened Gordon to what I know, and what he should do to keep it from being known."

A sick feeling falls upon you. You don't even want to know how she knows or ... WAIT! It's her word against him and yours... Two against one!

"Who would believe your crazy ass?" But before you could shake off the sick feeling there's a phone screen shoved in front of your face. You couldn't make out what she was getting at until you were able to focus on...

a picture of Gordon pounding you on the kitchen counter. 

This sick feeling just got serious, because you were now genuinely at the mercy of your crazy fake friend. Your vision starts to become out of focus, you hear her talking about how she knew how he has looks at you because she has seen it before through the multiple times she's been on Hell's Kitchen although this time was different and that oh no he can't seem to control himself and the more he sees you and how you act he can't seem to stop thinking about you. You're motionless.

"He always favors the others... Yeah. If he doesn't have me as the winner of this season, its gonna be the end of his career, family.. His life will be ruined for sure. But anyways! Man this is really fun- to be like... I don't know... the master of this whole thing." Jordan opens the door to leave the bathroom but looks at your distraught face one more time.

"Thank you for making the wrong decision Y/n. Good bathroom girl talk."


	14. Dissociating Dinner Service

It started slow at first- not the dinner service, but the nausea. You felt Jessie's words twist your mind like a meat grinder. It had been a couple minutes in the bathroom before grabbing and slipping into your chef clothes. Looking presentable wasn't even an option for you. Putting one pant leg on after the other became an automatic action. You weren't really there anymore, and you didn't even know what mattered to you anymore. A tussle of regrets bounce- not only in your head but your gut. You would say it felt like you needed to throw up but your body was not going to let the consequences of your actions and the betrayal of your friend be relieved by vomiting. 

Getting in line was automated, walking was automated, looking forward was automated and not speaking was automated. One thing that wasn't automated was preparing to see Gordon. But no matter, it was almost like everything was virtual reality all of a sudden, because seeing him did not make a difference within you. Having to stand in front of him in formation was automated. It was instinct to become as dense as he was earlier. In your automated gaze there's a moment of sadness you notice in his brow. 

"Alright listen up-" He starts speaking and you weren't listening. You look other to Jessie. She's normal and confident with a puffed up chest. This time she has her hair up in a ponytail-braid with the bandanna instead of down. It sparked anger within your friction of thoughts.

All in one moment everyone scatters to their stations, that wasn't planned in your action queue. This finally gave Gordon an opportunity to yell profanities at you. He's put everyone down at least once throughout this whole show, now is the perfect time. 

"GO!"

"Really? That's all he's got?" You catch whispers of the other team as you're running to the appetizers. He hasn't been fair if you really think about it. Making salad was automated as you dwelled upon how you even got rapped up in this. At first you felt the guilt swell, then, even though shifting blame wasn't really your style, isn't Gordon the ringmaster for all this? If anything he dragged you into this mess. Jessie knew this was going to happen. Why did it have to be you?

"WHERE IS THE APPETIZER?!" Gordon's voice zapped your senses and had you stumbling towards him.

"Appetizer ready."

You couldn't care a less if there was a mistake, but without a word he sent it out with the rest of the food. You have an open ear walking back to your station.

"I just really want you to be... mine." His previous words intoxicate you. He's got everything he needs, a beautiful wife and children. Why did ... he need you?

"FOR FUCKS SAKE Y/N!" 

That's the Hell's Kitchen Gordon you've watched for years. The boiling water beneath you begins to go out of focus. Only until now you realize how much you're sweating. You're losing control of your actions and respiration, there's a numbing sensation; almost like the weight of your body starts to sink out of your feet and hands onto the floor.

"Someone get her back in the game, she's gone off the deep end!" 

Jessie comes around the corner and takes over your station, before your panic attack started to set in, her side glance slaps you across the face. Before the heart palpitations, the loss of vision and breath and balance. She's the last thing you see.

Sickening.


	15. Through the Blue Doors

An immediate end to the dinner service took place and unfortunately, an immediate victory for the boy's team. The elimination room had never had such a menacing and tense atmosphere before. The double door exit glowed blue, contrasting the spacious room lights, that shined a red fluorescence. Nobody was happy. Even the boy's team, whose accomplishment wasn't based on anything they'd done. So it wasn't an accomplishment. And a chick had a freaky panic attack.

Speaking of which, after the hyperventilating ceased, the amount of attention and pitiful eyes was more than you could handle. Standing with your team felt wrong and embarrassing after that. Standing next to Jessie- the clever enemy felt wrong. Furthermore, standing in front of Gordon, the man in which you cannot decide to be angry, worried or sad with, felt all the more wrong.

You remember the dramatic music that plays in this segment of the show. This is the first time noticing a soundtrack would dampen this agonizing silence. But a crack of thunder strikes.

"What- the ever-loving fucking hell?"

"Why does he sound angry? I didn't do shit." Your inner voice speaks.

He proceeds to ask the boys team who they nominate for elimination. After the guy is gone, Gordon motions the boys to go back to their rooms.

Before he could say anything to us he squeezes his eyes shut and pinches the bridge of his nose.

"I have a lot on my fucking mind let me tell you."

He stands there for a moment, his mouth resting on his knuckles. You both know what is coming,

"Rachel, first nominee and why."

This is the first time Rachel has had to choose.

"Well, chef... Y/n was really not in the game tonight."

"So Y/n?"

"Well... yeah. She should not crack under the pressure. Chef."

*Violin tension*

"I have never cracked before bitch." Your inner voice speaks again.

"Okay. Second nominee and why."

"Jessie."

You turn to Rachel behind you automatically wide-eyed. Jessie is to your left, and you do not dare look at her. You can feel hell radiating off of her. As if by the grace of God Rachel chose her for some reason. This could be the freedom for you and Gordon!

"-She also did not have her head in the game tonight, slow and the mistake on the salmon really messed us up. Chef."

Gordon's stress levels rise like a high tide. But his composure stays steady. You cannot believe you're going against Jessie. There is hope for you and Gordon, but only if he is willing to give up everything for you. All he's worked hard for. All that he built... His kids...

"Oh God." You want to cry.

"Both of you get your arses up here."

Your walking pace matches with her's, Jessie is almost gleeful to be able to hear Gordon send you away. You keep your eyes fixated on Gordon.

"Jessie. Why should you stay?"

"I know I have made like mistakes, but through every service, I feel myself becoming the chef you want me to be. Like, I know I can. And I know that it's dire- for me to stay." Her acting is phenomenal. Jessie doesn't rock his boat with the hidden threat.

"Y/n. Why should you stay?"

You ponder a moment, just staring at a man you have fallen in love with too quickly and is almost someone you don't recognize as Gordon, but as Chef. The mean and stern persona he plays up. Who is he really?

"I- can only say that my time here has changed my life. I have prepared for this show for years and years and have done better than I could ever imagine. I have aced almost every challenge you've thrown at me and have not ever cracked under pressure during any other dinner services... But..."

Nothing is worse than saying this,

"I don't know why I'm here anymore."

-And nothing is worse than taking off your jacket, placing it in Gordon's arms, seeing his bewildered expression right before you push open the blue exit doors. As the red fluorescent lighting is replaced with the cool hue, it's almost like finally being put out of your misery.

Living being like under Jessie's power, under the questioning of Gordon and your's relationship, under the moral ambiguity and the pressure of Hell's Kitchen. And the blue doors leading to the afterlife of being free from that now! Except...

You're going back home. And you have lost the love of your life.


	16. Mom

"Don't make me go over there and hug you." Your mother's stern point contrasted her playful tone. She's leaning against their guest-room doorway while you sat on the bed with a natural depression-slouch. Apparently you looked even worse than you thought.

"It's- I'm okay." Your sigh gives her the cue for the famous question,

"You need anything?"

"No I'm fine." Before she leaves, you decide to stop beating around the bush and tell her the big news.

"I uh, got my job back from the hotel. Except now- I'm the uh, head chef." Your words are skittish and unsure, trying to avoid her ears.

She looks at you and nods with sincerity,

"That's awesome. You're really gonna do great. I mean, for now you got the best job you can get around here."

It's true. There aren't very many job options in this town, one of the many reasons you desired to get out of there in the first place. It wouldn't be long now before you reach enough money to officially move out.

"Thanks mom. I mean, even if the people are shitty-"

"Stop your tongue! You don't cuss in my house." She shouted abruptly, she says that like you're a sixteen year old. 

"Sorry! Um... Even if the people I work around are uh... rude... at least I can be in charge of the menu and kitchen and ... yeah."

"You're overqualified."

"Yeah I know."


	17. Welcome to the Cedar Hotel

The Cedar Hotel, a "luxurious" establishment meant to blend with the rest of the wooded nature. With 115 pricey rooms that are designed thematically to a lone-cabin feel. Sounds decent enough right? Except you never get used to the musty smell that hits your nostrils the moment you open the front door. Your first return you prayed the infamous receptionist wouldn't say a word to you, but before your first step she already has you by the throat.

"What brings you back?" She croaked. Ms. Morter, who you could bet she could drop dead on her keyboard at any second, reeked of stale perfume. Her wrinkles melted off her cheeks as she frowned at your arrival. You were tempted to snap at her about the broken glass window aligning the doorway. You'd say, "Thought this would be fixed by now Ms. Morter."

But you simply admit your defeat about your dream.

"Typical." The syllabus leave her thin lips slowly. After she inhales a cigarette. 

Typical of her to be incapable of basic empathy. You'd hope that the management of the hotel could at least improve the dingy lighting and the carpet. It's old and crusty, with the same pattern as the Timberline Lodge's carpet for God's sake. The only thing positive about this situation is you can finally control the food and kitchen of this shit hole. 

"Y/nn!" Your manager meets you in the kitchen. Sven has always reminded you of a hyena. He will force laughter in every conversation, showing his unflattering teeth. Even though he isn't much older than you are his hair is receding rapidly. Which is strange because his sideburns are long and thriving. Not to mention his- unpleasant vocal register. 

No wonder you never really thought of sex before going on Hell's Kitchen.

"Nice to see you again Sven." You smiled through your lie.

"Ah yes- you know, the moment I heard you had failed with that Heaven's Kitchen or whatever I couldn't have been more happier! Heaheahea!"

You push out chuckles to keep him happy. His stubby hand pats your shoulder a little too hard.

"No but... Real talk: You are going to pull us from the dirt young lady."

"You're literally 5 or 6 years older than me." You fantasize about tearing off his sideburns.

"Well. Since you're head chef now, you have control over the kitchen, making sure it's all clean, annd..."

You wait for the main privilege of being head chef. 

"Keeping all the chefs in check. You think you can handle it rookie?" Rage fills your head and only a drop slips through your tongue,

"I have worked here for years before leaving you know." You cannot believe your loss of control. You quickly flash a joking smile to keep him from assuming any kind of aggression.

"Well... you've never been head chef is all I am saying. HaehHaeh!"

"Of course! Right! I uh, really do appreciate you accepting me back here." 

"And it is with deepest pleasure." His untamed eyebrows bounce at you. Cringe.

"So, I have control over the menu right?" You should've asked that immediately before.

"Uh, um. Y/n, I have a very clear image of the kind of food will match this environment. I cannot let anyone serve anything that doesn't match. Haehaw!"

Your heart sinks. 

"Of course Sven."

"Call me Mr. Pedersen. Or if you feel extra good, sir."

Only Mr. Pedersen can make you feel more disgusted than the mushrooms growing behind the stairs.


	18. Day by Day Til that Very Day

All you could do is your best, everything that you do you try to think of what would make Gordon proud. Despite that problematic tragedy, your heart still swells at the thought of him. The first night being head chef you have a nice reunion with the one co-worker that functioned like a normal human being. His name is Nick, tall, skinny whose arms seem longer than they should be. He's not much older than you either, but to be frank- the alcohol isn't aging him perfectly. He has a good heart and puts up with the abusively low-wage despite working there for years as sous chef for two other head chefs. You feel a twinge of guilt at the fact that the last time you were there you were the lowest rank, and now above him despite his dedication. 

"Now that's what I'm talking about!" Nick spreads his arms out at your first arrival. You laugh because he's obviously trying to act like a hip-hop rapper with him bending his knees.

"Good to see you again Y/n." Nick wraps his narrow arms around you patting excessively.

"You too Nick." You pat back rapidly and both chuckle again at your inside joke. Suddenly he pulls away and exclaims,

"Aw man you gotta tell me everything that happened!" His gray eyes brightened.

"Well not everything..." You think to yourself, trying to hold back abrupt lewd flashbacks.

"Well- it all ends with me being sent back... but it was so worth it."

"Obviously. You're head chef now!" He leans in speaking out the side of his mouth, 

"Not that there's really any difference in payy."

"Haha! Yeah, that's Sven for ya. And, well- Nick. About me being head chef and everything... You really should be having my position. For fucks sake you've worked here for years!"

"Are you kidding me?" He then cracks a sly smile, "You've got the one and only Gordon Ramsey training. You're overly qualified for this you know that?"

Hmm... That made you blush a bit.

"I guess so..." Your arms are hugging your sides.

"Anyways we'd better get to work, dinner service starts in 2 hours." Nick turns away and grabs a wet towel off the sink.

You know the routine, have a basic clean before dinner service... but,

"Where is the other chefs?" You question out loud.

"You're looking at them." Nick outstretches his arms again.

"Oh."

"So lets get to work."

Very few customers showed that night. Even less that what you remembered. But one thing that's different for the better is the lack of complaints and returns, and the waitresses reported satisfied diners. That excited you like a gambler getting a triple lucky 7. Even if the food wasn't fresh, like the menu lies, you can still make it decent. You stayed late however, the kitchen in unseen places was horrendously bad. You probably weren't qualified to clean the mold growing behind the appliances, but you had to try! This was simply unacceptable. You can imagine Gordon's rage if he saw this very thing. The first thing you think of is bleach. That must kill mold with all that strong chemical. You scavenge the cleaning closet to find a bleach that has barely been touched, as well as a scrubber brush and gloves. With a jacked wrapped around your nose and mouth you began to attempt to wash out the mold with water bleach and scrubbing. It seems to be working pretty well! 

"Once I get this done. I won't have to do it again." You think to yourself. 

As crazy as it sounds, you end up working 4-5 hours over, just scrubbing the mold off this kitchen. It now looked so much better, at least clean enough to keep contamination from happening. If you knew this mold was growing, you would've never ran a dinner service.

The next morning you go straight to Sven and are determined to tell him of your traumatic cleaning spree, but it's hard to get his attention when he wont stop moving.

"Mr. Pedersen! If you would just listen,"

"Good morning Ms. Morter! Ah- not now Y/n."

"Mr. Perdersen, I have to tell you about last night-!"

"Nick, the kitchen looks extra lovely today. Keep up the good work haehaehae!"

You cheeks get hot from anger, but you stop and think of a way to reach him.

"Mr. Pedersen- sir."

"Ahhh yes you rang Y/n?" Sven coos at you.

"Last night I found some mold growing behind the stove and just all around wherever it can get behind. But I dealt with it."

"Hoh my Lord. Well. Thank you Y/n, God only knows what would happen if that got in someone's crab cake heaheahea!"

"Haha for sure. One thing I should mention, I had to stay very late. Like... four hours late."

"Just goes to show how much dedication you have! I can't believe I have a gem like you. Tell you what, next time you wanna stay in this hotel- maybe with a certain somebody, you can get one night free." 

Your jaw stayed dropped for awhile.

"Have a good day Y/n."

This treatment continued for the next four to five months. You've been debating on taking up a second job just to get the hell out of here faster. Although you have no clue how you would make time for it... Sven not only has you in the kitchen but you've become an unofficial janitor. Cleaning whatever you know how to clean, bathrooms, bed sheets, and vacuuming. There's only two other cleaners who have no motivation to do their job right. You don't blame them.

Your life really couldn't get any worse or move any slower. You took it day by day. The only thing that kept you going is running away. Running away from this town, this job, these people, Gordon-

"GORDAN RAMSEY?!" You hear an excited squeal from downstairs, no doubt it was Ms. Morter. It startled the hell out of you and you would've thought she was just having a conversation if she didn't sound so surprised. You steady yourself down the wooden stairs hearing the jingle of the front door bells. 

The recognizable blonde hair processes, the recognizable stance processes and finally

the recognizable voice.

You bolt back upstairs holding onto your bursting chest, your knees started to give out as you run into a room and lock the door. You were shaking uncontrollably, fear, excitement, resentment, relief, thankfulness and love was the the shit show premiering within yourself at the moment.


	19. A Rocky Reunion

"Hold on hold on hold on hold on-" You kept repeating to yourself, hearing his slight murmurs from downstairs. You still had a tight fist against your chest while sinking onto the floor and your pulse resonated hard throughout your body. Even in your gut, which slipped a shameful feeling through the bars of reason. They were getting thin anyway.

"What the fuck is he doing here?" You had your face against the dirty carpet as you focused in on each sound you could catch under the door. 

"Did he know I was here?" You never told him about your life before Hell's Kitchen.

"What am I going to do?" You sat up against the door once you knew you couldn't hear anymore. You tilt your head back to focus on the ceiling, your arms feeling weak at your sides. You couldn't decide what was the worst thing: 

1\. Seeing him after that embarrassing crisis

2\. Having him see where you ended up after leaving

3\. Probably going to be criticized for choices of food, when you really don't have a say in the matter

4\. And finally, having to hold back feelings

You envisioned the images of these circumstances on the ceiling, like a projector. While watching them pan out it would rewind every time the circumstance took a turn for the worst and tried to think of a different way it could pan out. Like scenarios where you can be a bit more evasive, whether that means changing your word choice or how you react to what he might say...

Just then you hear the rusty door handle turn, the door supporting your back begins to separate, and you couldn't stop the frightening drop to that dirty carpet. You are lying on the floor, half of you in the room and half in the hallway. Looking up at perplexed Gordon and Sven at his side.

"Y/N WHAT THE ACTUAL HELL?!" His hyena register exceeds a inside voice.

Gordon is speechless, as your eyes meet- it's clear this isn't over. Gordon has seen many messes in his hotel rooms, but you definitely the first hot mess he's seen. He would've smiled, but this was at the same time a very tense moment. He definitely didn't get over what happened. 

You shot up quickly- too quickly, making your head dizzy.

"Mr. Ramsey I apologize for this maid's behavior, she usually isn't like this, I-I'm not sure what has gotten into her you see? Anyways, Y/n, I will defiantly be having a little convo with you after I'm done showing Mr. Ramsey his room."

He motions you to leave but the dizziness from the low blood pressure didn't leave. You're serious shock and your vision subsides. Both Gordon and Sven become bathed in white. Once they see you start to collapse like a puppet released from the strings, Gordon lunges forwards to have your body lifted by his lovely arms.

"OH MY WORD!" Sven gasps, Gordon predicted it a bit, he saw your face go pale and your eyes roll back a bit. (He's seen it before BUT in different context........)

"I-I guess have her on the bed for a bit- I guess this has to do with seeing -uh, you again. She was on your show. Didn't seem to go well for her haehae." Sven will not stop blubbering on, it was starting to irritate Gordon.

"Yes, I know her well. I have caused her a lot of anxiety."

Sven grits his teeth a bit tha t you ruined Gordon's room tour and first impressions. He was very lucky however, that Gordon didn't get to comment on the dead flies on the windowsill. 

"Well, maybe it would be better, if I left you to uh- make sure, she's okay." He makes his way slowly out the door, hoping Gordon would encourage him to stay. But Gordon doesn't say anything, while he unpacks his suitcase. So Sven slowly closes the door behind himself. 

You would wake up shortly after, becoming aware of the tension building behind your neck. You turn over and sit on the side of the bed, squeezing the pestering knot. You assumed no one was in the room, that they left you- 

"FUCK." You breathe out loudly, not sure what to think about this whole situation.

"You can say that again." 

You hear that British accent behind you, his voice like an electric current straight to your heart. You look- to see him just out of the shower.

A towel hugs his waist while shower drops still reside on his bare skin. Steam is still emitting from him and the bathroom and his hair shaggy and damp. His smile convinced me that throughout all this pain and stress, if it all lead to this moment,

it was all worth it.


	20. Tension

"Oh my God-" You look away with a hand over your mouth, trying to hide your beaming smile. Gordon couldn't help but become a little overjoyed by your reaction. He knew right away that he could still talk to you.

"Uhm- hi." You weren't the only one that was giddy.

You sigh out, your back facing his. Your composure returns,

"You knew I was here or something?"

"I didn't know it was particularly you." He starts to rummage behind you, you assume he's putting on some clothes. You dare not look.

"Okay..." You expect him to explain, but nothing is heard besides a jingle of his belt. There's a long moment of silence, you stare hard at the wooded wall that had a ugly fade. At this point he has to be fully dressed, so you can focus. You shift yourself on the bed to face him. His shirts still off, he only has tight dark levis with that brown belt. 

You become disorientated from his perfect presence.

"Aw shit-" 

"What?" He coys at you.

"Put a fucking shirt on or something."

He still stands there, his head slightly cocked to the side. Your hands were getting fidgety. He grabs a stick of deodorant and starts to rub under his arms. 

"Is that anyway to talk to a hotel guest?" 

You sigh out again. Was it frustration? Or amusement? Even you didn't know.

"Tell me why you are here." You manage to challenge him with eye contact. His muscular right arm is still raised, and rested on a high shelf. You're reminded of the night at that restaurant, C'est Magnifique, where he told the story of that scar. Such a wonderful time. 

Felt like a decade ago.

"I got a call, I get so many but- this one- the guy said that a girl that used to be on Hell's Kitchen doesn't deserve to be associated with this establishment." His head rests on that same arm, his neck muscles look contoured by God himself. He slips on a blue flannel while he continues,

"I couldn't help but wonder if it was you. It could've been anyone. But I wanted to see if I could possibly see you one more time." 

You appreciate the sentiment but you couldn't help but say,

"If she knew you were here you're life- would get screwed up." He stands up straight all of a sudden, approaching the bed. With explains with expressive gestures,

"Who? My wife? That woman Jessie? Jessie got what she wanted, there's no need for her to care what I do about my love life now." 

He ends by kneeling at the edge of the bed, his hands clasped together and elbows rested on the squeaky mattress. Your stresses were a bit lifted, but your heart sank for the lack of justice.

"Damn. Where is she now?"

"Not in a place of power." Gordon gets a gleam in his blue eyes.

"What do you mean?" Your excitement and curiosity is obvious.

"I mean, that she is now in a position of simulating a head chef, and no worries! That picture is out of her possession."

"Picture... Picture... OH SHIT THAT PICTURE." You remember that scandalous image. You couldn't help but catch a red hue across the cheeks.

"That's good." You swallow.

He gives you an intentional teasing silence, as if he's reading directly into your thoughts.

"What?!" You bark at him.

"Oh nothing." He turns away suddenly and picks up his phone from the bedside table.

"No- Gordon what are you hiding?" You lunge for his phone across the bed, you suspect that-

"Just a lovely memento of our time together."

At this point you are leaping for his phone at the peak of his outstretched arm. Demanding for him to let go. While jumping on him, the physical contact from your breasts secretly excites him. Especially since his flannel was still unbuttoned.

"GORDON! GIVE ME THE PHONE! NOW!" There's a big contrast in his height compared to yours, there was no way you can reach that phone but you still try.

"Okay! Okay! Baby hold on!" Gordon laughs in amusement. He lowers the phone to you to show you a picture of you and him. Although it was just you and him on the trolley, with you looking out the window and him taking a enthusiastic selfie. You were pleasantly surprised, you had no idea this existed.

"And also this." 

His finger swipes to the left to show that cursed image, Gordon pounding you on the kitchen counter.

"OH MY GOD GORDON!" You voice fills the whole room, along with more of his laughter.

"What the hell is wrong with you?! What if-" Your voice immediately got quiet,

"What if your wife saw this?!"

"What if?" His face hurt from grinning.

"Goddammit." You pinch the bridge of your nose. Now both of you were just veering away from the point of reuniting. You again rub that knot behind your neck, firm like a stone. You've always been prone to getting neck and back problems. The tension is real, one good thing about being at home is every 2/3 weeks you've treated yourself to a generous massage from the local spa. 

Your body ached for that relief.

"Neck hurts?" Gordon's eyebrows form a deep furrow filled with care. You ignore his question, you know where he was going to go with that.

"What do you expect to happen from me? I mean- I should've asked you this in the first place. B-but what do we do now? You've got a whole family that you've..."

You tried your hardest to avoid the word "betrayed". You plop down onto the edge of the bed again, at this point you weren't sure how long you've been in the room with Gordon. But Sven wouldn't dare impose until Gordon comes out. 

You stutter on with your head down, to reach that sore spot.

"Ok- s-so I can take some of the blame for sure. I could've said no, and maybe I escalated and encouraged your-"

"Y/n." Gordon softly interrupts.

"Yeah?" Your eyes climb back up to his, your vision was blurry, you weren't aware of the tears starting to form.

"It's not your fault." He swiftly sits by your side. His weight makes the bed sink and squeak loudly. Showing the low quality of the mattress. Without warning his arms are around you. A wholesome embrace, without exploring hands. You melt onto him, and instead of tears leaking out of you, it's your overwhelming love for him. 

"Gordon.." Your voice muffles in his shoulder.

"Mmhmm."

You felt yourself becoming drunk on his touch.

"Can I have a massage.... chef?" The words slip out like a bar of soap. You surprisingly don't sense any awkwardness.

"Oh!" Gordon was a little astounded by the sudden request, but couldn't want anything more. That familiar tension was in the air, the kind that causes aches and pains a bit lower than the back and neck.

"Of course darling."


	21. Gordon's Massage

He shuffles behind you, his movements swift but careful. The bed under you rises from the counterweight of Gordon's crossed legs.

You feel his fingertips graze the back of your neck as he moves your hair to the side. 

Nothing is said and his hands rest idly on your shoulders for a moment.

"Your tense." There's a low huff under his words. And he was right, your excitement and anxiety were at a brutal brawl within you. But, it was now that you had to decide to leave the world for awhile. And be awake in one where there's only your shoulders, neck and his leathery hands.   
You naturally exhale to relax. Gordon's thumbs start to craft their way through your upper back, your arms go limp at your sides.

He starts with unhurried circles focusing on loosing you up, it was quickly apparent that your feminine dress shirt was creating irritating friction. You start to unbutton it without warning and he started to panic a bit.

"Wait- I should lock the door!" 

"Sure. I mean I'm wearing a tank, so, I don't have tah..." He barely got started and you were already so relaxed. He still got up anyway to lock the door, "That actually is a good idea..." Your brain couldn't function properly. He hops back onto the bed, and admired how you looked in a white tank, but along with that your bra straps were jet-black. This fueled something within him.

"Okay. Now then." This time his palms were more deliberate against your bare skin. Your eyes widen for a moment at the sudden sensation. You try to hold back any kind of sounds that might leak out of you by disguising your desire.

"Cool." You casually give him a thumbs up, you desperately wanted him to keep going.

"That's good?" His dominant fingers start to break down your neck. 

"It's so insanely difficult not to moan." Your eyes are shut tight. You give him a quick "Mhm." 

The pressure becomes more intense as he massages your neck and shoulders. His precision on your knots more intense now as well. Because of that, there was a bit of pain, and it made it even better. The room is starting to feel a bit heated and humid all of a sudden. Your body starts to rock back and forth naturally a little bit, he knew you were in a trance with your eyes still closed. Now a sweat is starting to build and your breathing is becoming increasingly more audible. That's the breathing Gordon has been haunted by ever since that morning alone in the kitchen. He couldn't be more happy than to be here with you.

He leans his head between your shoulder blades as he starts to discover the muscles in your lower back. 

You lose control of a stifled vowel that leaves your mouth. It only makes his breathing and hands pick up the pace. Now there was no way you could not make sounds. Feeling his fingers influence the knots in your back couldn't arouse you more, and him feeling the thump of your pulse throughout your body couldn't arouse him more.

Except maybe the sounds you're making right now... or seeing you naked.

"Raise your arms." That low huff is louder under his words.

With nothing but enthusiasm you raise your arms for him to pull that white tank off your body.

"Gordon-" You turn your face to reveal a flustered rash covering your cheeks. Your tone and breath were sporadic and feeble. Your body moves on it's own, once your eyes catch his. You turn around to tumble on top of him. It's an absolute delight for him to feel gravity push your breasts against his bare chest with only a black bra in between contact.

"I've missed you." The way hair falls in front of your sensitive face makes him want to cry.

"Oh Y/n, I've-"

You had to cut him off with your lips. There was still more to discuss. But now wasn't the time.


	22. Wedding Ring Removed

Your lips collapse onto his, you had been so starved from him for so long, that you almost bit into him. Your hunger triggers his, and he couldn't help pressing and squeezing your ass onto his bulge. His erection gave away his desperation, his head twitches under your clothed slit.

"Y/n, I fucking- love you baby." He leaned in and groaned deeply into your ear, it pierced through your being.

"I ah-!" His hands rummage for the buttons on his pants, signalling you to undress. You both rush to show skin, blood and adrenaline rushes through your bodies.

"Fuck do you even know what you're doing to me?" Before you know it you have a fully naked Gordon on his knees in front of you. His cock is clearly restless, tapping on his beautiful stomach. 

"I can see it." Your comment was cocky. You pull down your panties before he could.

"Haha right." His fingers trail from your inner thigh to your heat. He plays with you a bit, you hold back a moan, biting your lip.

"And I know what I do to you."

You found yourself wiggling your hips and spreading your legs, trying to get more stimulus from the tips of his fingers.

"Mmmagh!" You whine,

"Aww, 'mmagh'." He mocks and even laughs at your sounds.

"Oh fuck aoff-!" Just as you were saying it, he forces two fingers inside of you. It hurt but you loved the familiar feeling, of him stretching you out.

"Even if we're not in the kitchen, you still give me respect young lady."

His words shook you to the core.

"Make me." Your head sunk into the bed a bit when you said that. He cocks his head to the side and smiles darkly at you.

"I see you haven't forgotten how to be such a naughty girl." He towers over you, one arm set beside your face and the other torturing you.

He fingers you a bit vigorously, which was unpleasant in the beginning, but then became a hot intense pleasure. Your breathing was out of control along with your sounds. He was starting to get breathier and breathier as well.

"You gonna cum already? Fuckin Christ- hasn't even been three minutes."

You responded by nodding your head with eyes shut tight and face red and sweaty.

"No no you're gonna look at me while you cum. Keep your eyes: open." He then switches hands suddenly, he shoves his fingers in your mouth where you can taste yourself. It turns you on even more, and having to look him in the eyes was driving you to the edge.

His other hand was just as effective if not more.

You came while he smiled at me.

You rode his fingers with prolonged wails. The orgasm seemed to last forever.

Before you could come down from the high he rubbed the head between your wet slit. With a cocked smile he moaned,

"You missed this huh baby girl?" His heavy breath never ceased to get you back in the game.

"Oh my God ye-s." Your voice squeaked.

"Fuck," you witness him lick your cum off of his fingers, his wedding ring right there.

"Finally some good fucking food." He slips the ring off his finger.

"Chef-!" You wiggle your hips like a needy bitch.

"No baby, get up, you're going to fuck me."

You scurry to get on top of him, your legs straddle him with his tip right on your entrance.

With no warning you plop down on his shaft, embracing the stretch. It took the breath out of both of you. But like a machine your body moves on it's own with only one purpose.

"You're so-! Agh-" You cried out.

"Big?"

"Mhmm!!!"

"Learn how to take it, and feel good- you little- ough!"

His grip on your hips started to pull. You take his hands and encourage that grip onto your ass.

An atom bomb was about to erupt within both of you. You couldn't even speak to each other as you stuttered, stifled and gasped to a sweet climax. Both of your faces made it clear that you were possessed by one another.

Unfortunately you both had to get dressed quickly and back to work it was. He put on everything except for that wedding ring. Who knew how he was going to act when it came time for dinner.


	23. Preparation and Inspection

It was a little after the time you were supposed to be preparing for dinner service with Nick. You'd hope he didn't hear what happened... and would sense that you literally just had sex. Unfortunately Mr. Pedersen enlightened him of the situation, and how they might need to cancel dinner service due to your "falling out". But nevertheless you recovered and with a quick break in the bathroom. You were able to wrap your brain with focusing thoughts of cooking, keeping thoughts of Gordon from spilling.

After changing in your chefs outfit you purposely gave a brief "see you later" and down the stairs you went.

Upon entering the kitchen you notice a lot of duties Nick had missed, disinfecting the preparation table and moving some of the meats from the storage fridge to the active fridge. But he is doing his best, and that's why you're there, to help.

"Thank God you're alright!" He exclaims, pulling the heavy trash bag out of the can.

"Yeah- I um, wha-what did Sven tell you?" 

"Pedersen told me that you were just shocked to see Mr. Ramsey again and was overwhelmed... I don't know.. But I understand completely."

"Yeah."

He really doesn't. He really couldn't fathom.

"I'm not used to getting yelled at- I myself am trying to prepare for the worst."

You hadn't even thought about that... How was Gordon going to act this whole thing out? Was he going to?

Before Nick could take the trash out you threw some plastic wrapping hiding underneath some cooking screens. You could see he was almost sweating from his worry, you let him throw the bag into the dumpster before putting your hands on his shoulders.

"He may seem like a asshole. But everything he says is to help you, and I promise everything will be alright." Nicks cheeks flush a bit and his gaze veers away. But he does smile and relieving smile.

"Alright. Y/n you always know how to make things better."

"I try. Haha." You kinda catch too much feeling coming out of his words, so you pat his shoulder and continue working.

Not long after Gordon enters the kitchen, he already looks a bit displeased,

"Not much of a turnout in the dining hall yeah?"

You both say nothing, and of course Sven comes trailing behind Gordon to try and bullshit everything.

"We've uh- been having not as many visitors as usual. It is the spring and all. Usually more in other seasons."

"Right well."

He clasps his hands together.

"You both don't mind if I have a look and see, what we've got here?"

He's very good at not showing any sign of interest in you, he's very indifferent. It helps you feel more focused.

He starts inspecting the kitchen, looking through every nook and cranny. Your heart started to sink as he entered the storage fridge. You knew he was going to find the steaks that weren't wrapped and cut properly. As he's in there, he finds and bucket of something even you hadn't noticed.

"What the fuck is this?" He turns to you and Nick. Nick looks at the bucket in horror as you look at it in disbelief.

You expect Nick to answer, since you had no clue, but his mouth remained shut. You look at him to try to get something out of him.

"I-uh-uh that would be the mash potatoes."

"Mash potatoes?"

"Yes we-we what we do is, we have a recipe for instant mas-h potatoes and once that's made we keep in storage-"

As Nick is explaining Gordon starts to become bewildered. And you had never heard such a thing, even when you last worked there you guys never did anything this weird and cheap.

"Oh fucking Christ- and you never knew this!?" Gordon accuses you of playing stupid. 

"N-no!" Is all you could say.

He tosses the bucket on the floor, the mash potatoes don't spill out since they're solid from freezing. He goes back to inspecting the fridge, and when he couldn't find anything else he goes to the large appliances.

He pulls them back, and you were calm considering the complete clean you did couple months prior. Although like revealing a disease, you see that same mold haunt you again.

"Oh my God-"

Gordon gasps.

"Mold. Fucking mold."


	24. Exposing

At first you desperately fish through your memories of cleaning behind the stove. But you could not find any explanation for the mold. It was even worse. Flourishing and blossoming.

You were sick of blaming yourself. You knew without a doubt that you cleaned that shit.

You stared at the mold, meanwhile he's going off on you and Nick. You're not looking at Nick, but you know he's shaking.

"I cleaned this months ago, it was spotless." You grimaced at the black and brown infestation.

Gordon stops for a moment.

"What'd you clean it with?" He folds his arms, willing to listen.

"Ah- fuck. I don't know- bleach!" The memory of pouring bleach and scrubbing enters your mind.

"Darling." His tone is more rational than before.

"Bleach will only kill the surface mold, so it'll seem gone but- it comes back months after."

He knows that you did your best, and noticed that you seemed to be the only one concerned with the mold in this hotel.

"Oh." You sighed out.

"You said you had cleaned this much mold months ago?"

"More than this."

He gives out an astonished chuckle as he glares at Nick and Sven.

"How long did that take?"

"Four or... five hours-"

"Only a hard working girl like you would take on a 3 person job."

Your heart stirs up, reviving you from the repetitive despair.

"And I'm assuming you were reimbursed for your over-time?"

"Uh..."

"Unfortunately the hotel- hadn't been- doing so well at the time heaheahea! So we had to post pone her-"

Gordon immediately interrupts.

"Are you fucking with me right now?"

"Am I fucking with-?" Sven's face goes pale.

"If I had known this was gonna be the shit hole that Y/n would've ended up, I would've never eliminated her!"

This was brightening your day for sure. Nick nodded in agreement, feeling shame.

"How long have you worked here?" Gordon shoots the question right at him.

"Aeh- um. *ahem Like... 5 years?"

"And this, has never been a concern for you?"

"I- have asked Mr. Pedersen, about the mold and he has always told me the cleaners take care of it..."

"The fucking-?" Gordon squeezes his eyes shut. It made you realize there's really no point in staying in this place. You just wanted to run away with Gordon.

"I didn't think I would have to tell those women to keep cleaning!" Sven raises his arms up in the air like the world is attacking him.

"Sir." Gordon looks at Sven directly in the eyes.

"I think you're bull-shitting me."


	25. Anticipated Escape

"YOU. ARE CLEANING THIS SHIT UP! I DON'T CARE HOW OR WHO BUT NOT WITH Y/N's HELP THAT'S FOR DAMN SURE!!!" Gordon's fuse breaks from Sven's incompetence. It felt satisfying to see the look on the idiot's face. This was better than any financial pay back for the overtime.

"THERE WILL BE NO DINNER SERVICE TONIGHT! DO YOU UNDERSTAND?!"

All Gordon has to do is look at Sven's face to lose hope in this establishment. He turns away to leave the kitchen, but he doesn't forget about you.

"Y/n. Come on, you still deserve that reimbursement."

You froze for a moment puzzled that he would say that in front of Nick and Sven. You hide the redness in your cheeks as you scurry out the swinging doors, behind Gordon.

You follow behind Gordon's long aggressive strides, not daring to bother him while he's still fuming. You wonder how Sven and Nick are going to do without you, and what they're thinking as you leave work without clocking out. It really didn't matter though. Before walking out of the hotel Gordon grabs his coat on the hanger next to the door. You notice the secretary snoozing at her desk- or she's dead- even so you did not dare speak.

Gordon holds the door open for you for a moment but manages to keep himself in front. The rainy night is like a whole different exciting realm. So much more beautiful than you've ever noticed, maybe it's just how Gordon's blue trench coat catches the rain drops. Shivers run up your spine from the thrill and chill of the moment. You wondered how he was going to "reimburse" you.

Before you know he's pressing his key to unlock his glossy black Jaguar, when the lights flicker your heart races in wonderment. Gordon walks around the car to the passenger side and looks back at you to see you had no coat. The rain had made your work clothes damp.

"Oh darling I'm sorry! I did not even realize." He frantically sheds the coat off his body to shield you from the mild downpour. Your steps are careful, somehow you believed that if you became anxious for this experience to last, you would end up awakened back in your life before Gordon came back. Before this dream-like experience. You turn around in front of him to seep the large sleeves over your arms.

His hands rest on your shoulders for a moment. You look at him behind your shoulder, to catch his alluring but gentle eyes, you cant keep eye contact- you look down with an embarrassed flush.

He says nothing as he opens the car door for you, and leads you inside with the other hand placed on your shoulder. You dip down into a luxurious car seat, a heavenly musk makes your head light and body shiver.

There's a interlude of silence, except for the patter of the light storm, as he walks back around the car to the driver side. You only watch for him, almost expecting to wake up from this wonderful dream before he could open the door. 

You memorize his movements as he almost falls in his seat, he was such a big man, he had to adjust the seat all the way back to fit his legs.

Gordon shuts the door and after getting comfortable, he turns to see your antsy gaze, your body slightly shaking from your exhilaration.

"You alright sweetheart?"

As a predator stalks their prey for so long just to finally pounce, you lunge forward to collide lips once again. Your hands hold on to his face almost for dear life, and the light storm is all that's heard once again. You part the heated kiss, when you speak he feels every breathy word against his mouth.

"Everything is alright once again. Please- get me out of that hotel."

The returning collision is so tender it could make him cry, you both hold on to each other like starving creatures. His arms wrapped tightly around your waist and yours around his neck. He doesn't even pull away to speak again as he muffles,

"With pleasure."


	26. His Car

"We should talk more later though- about- ah!"

His teeth graze your neck.

"Ah-ah-about who, er what we are going to bee!"

A sexually frustrated snarl makes your hairs stand up and your chest lock in air.

"Mmm I know what I want you to be baby girl."

You don't know what answer to anticipate, will it go that far or... He looked like he had an answer in his mind, but quickly refuted it. At this point you could take any kind of closure or answer or context,

where was this all really going to go?

Gordons eyes climb back to yours and even though he wore a smile his eyes were fearful.

"Whatever you want to be."

He unintentionally shifts all the pressure onto you, even though he was trying to help. You search for the right answer in his worn eyes. When nothing came to mind you sighed and looked outside the car window.

"I have so many questions."

"I know."

You could get into details later... but if you completely ignored the subject it would eat at your brain if you have sex with him again. A blush appears on your cheeks to the a near possibility of doing it in the car. The thought hits different. But you can't let that distract you right now.

"Do you love me? And, I mean, really love me. More than her? Don't lie, not that I think you would but..."

His hand gently turns your head back to him, away from the outside.

"I do. I really do."

The sincerity could rip apart mountains. It made your heart stir and flutter.

"Than will you be my husband instead?"

Christ is this crazy?

"Of course."

Suddenly you push him back to his car seat and scurry to get on top of him, he still had his coat on, you knew you were just rushing to fuck him again out of sheer happiness. You kiss him all over as he struggles to take off the coat, his cheeks, mouth, nose, ears...

"Baby at least give me a chance to-"

You unintentionally cut him off with another kiss, when you didn't break away, his hand comes down firmly, slapping your ass.

Your body jolts like being jumpstarted and you break away immediately. You know what his sneer means as he takes off his coat.

"Patience sweetheart."

You give a quick "-Sorry-" and bite your lip, not breaking eye contact as he throws his coat to the back seat. He doesn't make any sudden movements after, his hands grip on your waist to move his thigh in between your legs. He doesn't even need to start bouncing his leg to make the butterflies swarm in your stomach. You already anticipated what he wanted you to do, but this was really embarrassing. Even though you've consummated plenty of times, the streetlight above the car is like a spotlight upon you.

And he's definitely expecting a show.

"Grind." He growls at you.

Its difficult to be the center of attention. Your whole body flushes and twitches, your head is crazed and fuzzy, his awaiting gaze is torture.

"I-"

His hand comes back down again to spank you.

"That's yes chef."

Another jolt making your head go back, and your hips thrust forward.

"-Yes Chef-!"

"That's my girl, cmon you know what to do. Don't be afraid of putting on a show."

You reluctantly and a little awkwardly grind yourself on his thigh. The traction was enough to drive you nuts. As you grind you shut your eyes or look down, having him watch you so intently was overwhelmingly embarrassing but so fucking hot. Not only that but the car was starting to rock to your rhythm, making a scene- not that anyone was nearby but still. You become wet enough to feel it through your black work pants.

Your hitched breathing and little whimpers were getting a rise out of Gordon. He craved to see you shameless before him.

"You're making my cock so hard baby girl, mm hump my thigh like that-!"

He knew exactly how to make you cum, his leg starts bouncing as he teases you to be a slut for him. This makes your clit even more stimulated than before. You don't even know what to do with yourself you feel like such a mess and your head is becoming light.

"Gordon-! Hoh my God! Agh Dah-"

"Y/n look at me."

He takes your hands away from your lewd face.

"Call me what you want to call me."

"MMm, daddy-!"

That voice of yours makes the tent in his pants ache so much.

"Cum for me." He takes a firm grasp of your breast as you have a great orgasm. Impressive for only dry humping.

"Look at what you've done to me." You eye down his boner, protruding the most you've ever seen.

"Fuck me with that cock." You still haven't recovered but your stripping desperately.

"Needy aren't we?"

Cumming in front of him conditioned you to be able to look directly at him while unbuttoning his pants.

"Alright sweetheart let me take the reigns." He brings his seat all the way down and notions you to crawl in front of him where he can fuck you from behind. You were facing the backseats and he wasted no time.

"Please-" You begged aimlessly with your back arched for him.

He has one hand slip around and under your waist feeling your belly, he grasps onto it lovingly with his other hand doing the same to your ass.

"Say that again."

Your blush intensifies with your face buried into the seat. You mumble the words,

"Please.. chef."

"I didn't hear you." He slaps your ass perfectly and spreads it wide.

"Please fuck me chef-! I want to get fucked in your car..."

"Ooh you like that huh? Feeling me-"

His trip was grazing your entrance. Lapping up the wetness.

"Wanting me to fuck you like a bad girl in this heated car? Hopefully no one sees us right? How embarrassing for you..."

He slides the tip in and at this point your hole is perfect for his cock, it anticipates his length and girth. That overwhelming satisfaction never gets old. But it doesn't stop you from being feisty.

"Would be worse for you though right chef?" You knew it was a risky talk-back.

He stops for a moment, you even thought he was actually offended, so you look back at him.  
Gordon's still holding your ass and he gives a smiling glare right back at you.

"You really want to be fucking talking like that to me Y/n?"

You don't let him scare you, even though your stomach blew butterflies. And his tip still lingered inside you, it was hard not to back into him.

"Well I'm just saying... having being taken and still pursuing a ... for lack of a better word student? Pretty naughty if you ask me."

He doesn't even spare a second,

"You're the only naughty one here Y/n, I planned a divorce long before I met you. It's just your sexy body and sexy personality and sexy ass sped things up a bit."

And with that you lost control and backed yourself into him to finally feel him fully inside you. He gave out a pleasantly surprised gasp following your needy moan.

"Ooh- see, look at that. I'm gonna have to fuck you so shamelessly and punish this sweet ass of yours. That's what you want from your chef right?"

*slap*

"Say. It."

"Ah g- yes daddy."

"... That works too babygirl."

Rough strokes began with your body becoming weaker every time he hit your cervix. You must be a masochist or something because this is a dream come true. It's so sweaty and hot in the car now, the momentum is making the car rock back and forth now. The humiliating sight from outside just edged you more.

"Gor-don!" You were so high pitched like never before.

"Yeah take that punishment you back-talking slut-!"

He went from spanking you to grabbing and teasing your nipples, that was sending you straight to an orgasm very quickly.

"I'm- really- I hah-!!!"

"Use your words, cmon you're a big girl."

"I'm gonna cum-!"

"You'd better stop yourself because I'm not gonna be done."

Too late, your walls are clenching and twitching, he knew you were going to cum early. And that was part of the punishment. He kept going.

"Wai-wai-wait- Gordon! Gordon! Stop! I can't ~!"

"Oh yes you can. Don't worry I'm about to cum- soon-!"

Even he couldn't hold back his sounds anymore. Your pleasurable wails along with his grunts and moans became such a shameless sight. He lifted you up with one hand around your neck and the other slipped and started to rub your clit.

"Look at me," He almost begged.

Your eye contact was feral but tamed all at the same time.

"I love you." Gordon's expression was so sweet but he kept fucking right into you. It drove you mad.

"I love you too- mph-!" You both kissed and fucked passionately to the point of insanity. He broke away to say,

"Your gonna cum with me." And after those words his hands played with your sensitive bits ever better, and his pace picked up drastically.

"Yes! - I-" your voice started to break away you had began riding out your high already.

"Oh shit! Fucking Christ baby girl!" He was fucking you as hard as he could before finally you both broke with shaking bodies.

Thank goodness that parking lot was empty.


	27. An Awaited Right Time and Place

"You shouldn't drink so much caffeine." Your mothers words were coming from the living room, you were in the kitchen pouring a fresh cup of coffee.

Your body was feeling heavy, tired and sore. Even reaching for the sweetener and half and half was a challenge, let alone coming up with a witty remark back at your mother.

"I need it today." 

"Didn't get much sleep last night?"

Seeing the cream spread and transform the dark liquid to a lighter shade made a breathy chuckle leave your lips. The transformation was parallel to how Gordon effected you, especially the image of white liquid-

"Girl you're groggy! Do you have work today?"

"No, I quit." You said nonchalantly, followed by a sip.

"Oh." 

Ever since you were a child you had never been a quitter of anything, no matter how hard it got. So she already sensed this was a heavy situation. Even if she knew nothing of Gordon.

"You wanna talk about it later?"

"Yeah." You nodded, which reassured her a little.

"Ok. Well, I'm gonna get some groceries. I'll be back later today."

"Sounds good."

Your phone vibrates before she could turn to walk away, she noticed almost immediately how your eyes lit up and your body jolted in excitement. Your phone screen showed a text from Gordon,

"Hey baby. Lunch together to plan things out?"

Your thumbs raced to reply- meanwhile you're completely unaware of your mom's sly expression. She's dead silent until you finally notice her still in the doorway.

"What is it?"

"Is he rich?"

"I'm sorry- WHAT?" Your eyes widened and your cheeks exposed a slight blush.

"You heard me."

There's a silence, the text you sent back was you recommending a local burger place. His reply came too soon, breaking that silence.

"How- I mean- well- MOM. IS IT REALLY THAT OBVIOUS?"

You avoid eye contact with her by reading his enthusiastic texts.

"Absolutely. I recognize that look anywhere. Especially from you."

"If it makes you feel better, yeah. He actually is pretty successful."

That's an understatement.

"I knew you would run into a wealthy gentleman at that drafty hotel! Only reason I encouraged you to stay."

You started to get up with your coffee and phone to leave the conversation.

"Alright well I'll see you later." Your mom laughs, taking the cue to leave for errands.

"Bye mom." 

You plop yourself down on the living room couch, Gordon's texts reflected his age. Obviously the older generations weren't used to the language of texts and social media, so reading his texts made me you giggle.

"I can not wait to see you there! My sweet."

And then in a separate text he sends a heart emoji.

"Hehe love youuu see you thereeee" 

By now you had finished your coffee and before you start to get ready you can relax for a moment. 

"How did my literal idol become my.. husband?" You started to reflect. Almost a year ago you had gotten the letter of acceptance to be on Hell's Kitchen. You still remember when he stuck up for you when that that man Chad was trying to put you down. That disbelieving rush you got every time you locked eyes with him. He was flirtatious from the beginning and thinking about how he looked at you in a bikini in his office- You started to relive those first feelings. Was it your blind determination and that secret fire within you that made him drawn to you? How you still saw your best as not good enough but never giving up? Despite the lack of support from your teammates you still were able to win many challenges. 

The only thing that was worse than quitting was seeing Gordon forced by blackmail to eliminate you. You couldn't take seeing his face like that, and that would've been the ultimate victory for Jessie, to have him take your coat.

You walked out on your own- it was easier for both of you. It left Jessie a little disappointed and the jealousy in her heart not completely satisfied. 

Gordon made sure she ended up in a 5 star restaurant she would believe herself to be in a place of power, just to have been slapped in the face with reality. While you were gone for 8 months, Gordon pressed charges for blackmail. Her phone was confiscated by the police and threatened to be sued by him in court. This was all a private affair.

After that exhausting ordeal he then focused on finding you, him and his wife had been not officially divorced but separated, only known by close relatives. 

You and Gordon talked about all of this on your lunch date. The burger joint was small but the atmosphere was welcoming and personal. The more you heard from him, and the more he heard from you in a time and place where you could slow down and think, your worries of the past, present and future were becoming forgotten. Like mosquitos being obliterated with Raid bug spray.


	28. The Choices Made and to be Made with Him (Finale)

If you had told yourself a year ago that you would end up in story of such of drama, love, betrayal, blackmail, loss and reuniting... Obviously you would've refused to believe you'd focus on anything other than your goal. Your goal to become a well renowned chef and maybe even have your own restaurant. 

But now, you could achieve that goal, having an unintentional advantage by having a relationship with Gordon.. And..

"Oh my God!" You remember last night all of a sudden. Before the having-car-sex-in-a-vacant-parking-lot part. A flashback of what you said plays in your mind.

"Do you love me? And, I mean, really love me. More than her? Don't lie, not that I think you would but..."

"I do. I really do."

"Than will you be my husband instead?"

...

"Of course."

When snapped back to reality you become almost dazed. Your elbow bumps into your chocolate shake, almost knocking it down. The astonishment that hits you had made you flinch and immediately concerned Gordon.

"Y/n!" He knows you just thought of something that gave you that reaction.

"Darling? Are you alright?" He leans across the table a bit.

You could not believe you forgot about that proposal stunt you pulled-

"Was it just- me, getting caught up in the moment?" You debated with yourself. "But- I want to.. get married for sure! I just-" 

You imagined his children. How would you all of a sudden become their mother? You didn't mind at all, but you're still pretty young. Any children you would have would be no older than toddlers. He has teenagers! Oh Lord they would probably hate you. They'd probably see you as the "homewrecker". 

"Talk to me." 

You feel his hand on yours. 

"Oh!" Your face must've looked really sad.

"Um! I'm sorry!" It's hard to get your thoughts together. But he is sat silent and still, patiently waiting until you were ready to tell him anything. Before you try to continue you dip some of your fries into your chocolate shake. Its the best taste.

"I- do- do you remember when I- um. Shit. Asked you to be my husband?"

"Last night?" His face lightens up with the most adorable smile.

"Well I don't know, was there another time I proposed?" You laughed sarcastically.

"No I guess not."

Between you both there was an unintentional silence, but it was comfortable. The grins you exchanged were worth more than gold. As you munch on your fries dipped in your chocolate shake, You just now noticed his slight messy hair, and the dark grey shirt that looked way too good on him for a simple T-shirt.

That's all it took to ease your stresses; at this point it didn't matter the bad circumstances that might come about from your relationship.

"You're regretting asking that huh?" The question in text would sound sad, but he was as smitten as ever. Almost like the answer wouldn't change anything. He'd still be just in love with you and glad to have met you even if you walked out on him right then and there. No regrets would form. Ever since he saw you a complete mess, no makeup, barefoot and in a panic, he knew he wouldn't be able to forget you. 

"Hell no!" You exclaim a little louder than an inside voice.

"It was impulsive.. sure, but- I can't imagine myself ever- being with anyone else... I just thought of your family... You know?"

"Yeah. They're going to love you no worries." Gordon pulls out his phone nonchalantly, looking through his camera roll.

"Uhh- are you sure?" You giggle a bit.

"Yeah, here is Megan, Holly and Matilda on a ski trip last Christmas."

He holds up his phone in front of you. On the screen you see three girls who looked to be teenagers. All three of them were sitting on the ski lift, leaving their dad on the ground with the camera. They looked so happy, laughing as they left Gordon far below in the snow. You couldn't help but wonder where their mother is.

"That's a great picture. Looks like they're laughing at their dad hehe." You teased.

"Yeah I can't help but amuse them." He stares at the picture for a moment before swiping through his camera roll again.  
He finds a picture of his son, Jack, to show you. His son looks to be in the kitchen making a simple omelet. Clearly he hates pictures being taken because his hand is about to reach up to block the camera. It creates a funny blur and his face is pretty hysterical. It make you almost choke on your fries from laughter.

"Yep that's Jack-a-boy. He looks cross in this picture, sorry about that."

"No no I love it."

Honestly you didn't know what else to say. You both go back to finishing your meal. It did give you time to think more about what being with him would mean. Being a step-mom? That's something you're not sure you can handle. Not because you have an urk about it but- are you going to be able to help raise them too? You definitely don't have experience. Are you worthy enough to be of any guidance?

"Shall we leave?" Before you know it he finished his meal. You nod and take his hand, but instead of leaving your fries unfinished you ask for a takeout box. You don't mind carrying it with you as you both stroll through town, leaving your cars in that parking lot.  
The day was starting to transition to evening, the sky becoming that mixture of purples, oranges and yellows. You encouraged Gordon to tell you more about his kids, you wanted to soak up everything about them, so they wouldn't be foreign to you. He gladly chatted away about their personalities, skills, and his favorite memories with them.   
Both of you end up in the city park, the small grassy hills occupied homeless people most of the time, but this time it seemed mystically vacant. Almost made perfect for you and Gordon. 

He must've gotten done talking because he charms at you,

"You're awfully quiet Y/n."

You were overthinking.

"Hmmm?" He hums near your ear and plants a kiss right on your cheek bone.

"I've never been a mother before." He sees the dismay in your eyes. If he were to immediately attempt to reassure you it would only further your overthinking. So he steps back a bit and breaths out an easy-going sigh.

"That weight isn't going to be heavy on your shoulders. You cannot disappoint them worse than her."

Your eyes widen by his severe words.

"I would have never thought of another woman if she didn't think of another man."

Your hands instinctually move to your mouth.

"Oh my God Gordon- Wha-"

WHY DIDN'T YOU EVER TELL ME? I HELD ON TO ALL THIS GUILT AND STRESS FOR SO LONG.

"I'm sorry I never told you. Obviously I found out about this before our separation. After finding that out I just wanted to forget her all together. I didn't want to go through all that divorce paper horse shit. Lucky for me she didn't want to deal with the divorce process right away either."

Ok...

"Cheating is wrong. I didn't want to use it as an excuse."

"But you didn't." You protested boldly. His lack of words encouraged you to go on.

"Just because you didn't go through the legalities, your relationship with finished right?"

Gordon and you find a grassy hill with a bench at the top, it perfect to sit at and watch the glorious sunset.

"I suppose, yes."

"This was not an affair."

Your words reigned in his head over anything else. 

You stared at the sun seeping through the purple streaked clouds, for some reason you felt the sun was a time limit. There was something you wanted to feel sure about, before the day ends completely. Otherwise it will keep you up one more night.

"Gordon."

"Mhm."

"Did I jump the gun by what I said last night?"

"Mmm... I'm happy with any pace you want to go baby. All I know is I'm lost without you. When you were gone, everything I did was to try to make things better and find you."

Your heart is cradled and injected by his words, like an antidote. But that sun is starting to disappear under the horizon. So you take his hand and stand up

You could bring it up with you to continue the slow stroll through your relationship and forget about that impulsive proposal.

Or

Lead him to his knee, where you stay true to your proposal- even if impulsive- your offer to be called his wife and him your husband- is your new dream.

And so what will it be Y/n? This isn't my decision. This should be yours. Whatever it'll be, it doesn't change that unforgettable sunset.


End file.
